We Will Be OK

I thought by now I would have a plan for tomorrow but I still have no idea how to proceed with my students.

I'm at a loss.

This post was going to be so much more but I just can't think of the words I need to express the sadness I feel for my students. I can't figure out how to say how hurt I am because my students chose to hurt each other. Am I a bad teacher? Did I neglect to show them that our classroom is our home for 8 hours every day? Did I do something to make them think this type of behavior is acceptable?

I can't help blaming myself, it's what I do. The more I think about it, the more I question. Was I always kind? Do I show respect to my students at all times? Do I accept my students for who they are and what they bring to the classroom? Am I rude or do I lose my temper at times?

I think I'll just go in with this attitude,

and see where we get.

This Doesn't Have a Title

I was just looking through my recent posts and came to this one about my super cool hobby and remembered how much fun I had that day with my students.

Then I thought about how crappy the last 3 days have been and I wondered how my mood could change so dramatically in such a short amount of time.

Seriously...my posts go: "Dominating 12 year olds at dodge ball...yep I rule" "Would you rather...Poop always wins!" "I cry a lot."

Ugh. I'm so glad it's the weekend. I'm going to read and relax and figure out how to help my students care about each other.

Universe in Balance

Ok. The universe definitely likes to keep my life balanced. Good things happen...immediately bad things happen.

Case in point: Universe says, "So you won a bloggy give-away of super cute note cards? How'd you like to go home to a caved in bathroom ceiling?"

Case number two: Universe says, "Your students are causing tons of trouble and making you cry like a baby? How about you win a super cute headband?"

Yep, the one I blogged about here, I won it. Wahoo! Here's to a hopefully great weekend!

Thanks, Jessica!

I Cry A Lot

**Waring: This post is super long. I warned you, don't complain later.**

Here's the short story: I cried at school today.

Here's the whole story.

On Tuesday a student told me there was something "really bad" written on a stall in the bathroom about another student in the class. It's something that doesn't need to be repeated and involves things that I had no idea even happened between men and women until I was well into junior high...well into junior high.

So the other teachers and I called a "girl meeting" during recess and told the girls that the writing on the wall is completely inappropriate and it will not be tolerated. We told the girls that we would be more lenient if the girl who did it came forward than if we found out and the girl never came forward. We added "we always find out" at the end of the meeting.

Fast forward to just after lunch on Wednesday:

Two girls come in to me to tell me they know who wrote on the bathroom wall. So as soon as the class comes in I call a mini meeting with my class and tell them that I know who wrote on the wall and I will give the person until the end of the day to admit it to me.

Fessing up didn't happen...

...until right before school today.

This student came to me and told me that she did it. I asked why and she said it was because this other student made her mad. Ok, that's not good enough. Turns out this other student made fun of her hair. Ok, I can see being upset about that (hello, I'm a girl. Girls are all about hair. I get it.) but...what you did? Not acceptable.

Principal gets involved.

Student is suspended.

Other student is leaving our school because she doesn't feel safe (this is not the first incident with this student being the picked on one).

These three things happened during lunch.

After lunch we have writing. My students always have some little writing assignment they do when they come in from lunch so they can settle down and get back to work after 30 minutes of being insane with their friends at recess.

Today's little writing assignment was "What does it mean to be respectful to ALL students in this school?" As they were finishing their writing, I gave them the definition of respectful from our dictionary. I don't really know why I chose to do that, but I did...and as I did, I began crying.

I'm the BIGGEST baby ever. Especially when it comes to people being unkind, disrespectful, vicious to each other and even more so when those people are my students who I care about as much as if they were my children. It breaks my heart. I can't control it. I can't shut off my heart. I've tried to not care and not get involved but it's impossible for me.

Maybe you think that makes me weak and a bad teacher in some way but I think it makes me a better teacher. The kids I work with have such difficult lives and they need to know there is someone there that cares. I am that person in their lives. If these kids leave 6th grade and the only thing they know is that I care about them, I will feel like I am a successful teacher. Ok, and I want them to know how to work with fractions and read at grade level.

Anyway, after they wrote I talked to them about how much it hurts me to hear that they are being rude to each other. I told them what bullying includes and that it is something you do that makes people feel bad. I think before today, they thought that bullying was being physically aggressive.

I cried and I was a wreck and I was embarrassed and I was angry and I was sad and I was done.

Our principal is sick of the crap that is going on in 6th grade so she had us talk to the kids and had them write lists of the kids that they've seen or heard bullying others and also kids they've heard swearing.

After I got these lists (if you were wondering, EVERY student in my class was on someone's list), I passed out the lyrics to Imagine by John Lennon and read the lyrics to them,

Imagine there's no heaven

It's easy if you try

No hell below us

Above us only sky

Imagine all the people

Living for today...



Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace...



You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one



Imagine no possessions

I wonder if you can

No need for greed or hunger

A brotherhood of man

Imagine all the people

Sharing all the world...



You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will live as one

Again, I cried. My kids cried. We cried together. I feel like I need to help the kids work on being kind and respectful every day.

If you have any songs, poems, stories, ANYTHING that would be good for these kids to hear, please leave a comment and let me know. I'm at a bit of a loss right now. I don't know what else to do with them.

I did learn that crying is a good weapon. These kiddos were so great the rest of the day. I loved it...aside from the feeling like crap part.

Would You Rather...

I work with kids. Obviously, I hear some pretty funny things.

I like to play "Would you rather..." with my students. I like hearing their reasons for why they choose things. It also gets a good discussion going. Occasionally, I have them write their own. What did I learn from this? They really like talking about poop.

Here's one of the gems that I got today:

"Would you rather...marry the ugliest person in the world and you could never divorce them or kill them or kill yourself...OR...eat poop for every meal for 3 days?"

Guess what won.


That's right...POOP!

Magical Monday

Top 3 reasons today was magical:

3. The 16 year old kiddo at Office Max didn't make me pay for my copy. Yep, it was probably like 10 cents but it made me feel awesome so here's to you sophomore with your first job...virtual high five!


2. I got a water softener. Oh happy day...and hair...and laundry...and dishes...and...showers...and everything else that uses water.

1. Since I started going to college all my hobbies went away but people still asked me "What are some of your hobbies?" I never had an answer...until today. I found my new hobby that I will gladly share with anyone who asks (and those lucky few who follow my blog). I will also write it on anything and everything that asks me for a hobby. No one will ever wonder what my hobby is again...Dominating 12 year olds at dodge ball. Yep, I rule.

Cute Headband...For Free!

I'm addicted to blog give-aways lately (if you haven't noticed) so I found A Few Good Things.

She's giving away a super cute headband. Go comment so you can win.

Give-away ends January 31.

Bathroom Calamity

I like making movies of myself. I'm also now obsessed with the mini calamity in my bathroom.



Not only do I have this hole in my ceiling but it's also moldy...great. I'm probably going to die. Apparently it's just been a slow drip forever and the drywall finally couldn't hold any more water and it began to crack last night. So due to the fact that my bathroom is moldy and smells like a garden and old men and is connected to my bedroom, I slept on the couch last night.

How's your weekend been?

Time for Free

Do you want to be a winner just like I am? (I'm referring to the note cards...not the missing ceiling.)

Well, then today is your lucky day. That's So Cuegly is having a give away for a really sweet juicer. I know you all made resolutions to be more healthy and what's a better way to be healthy than to make your own juice every morning?



Also, here's some great bar stools.

Prepare to be Super Un-Jealous

I came home from work today to a horrible thing...


a dripping bathroom ceiling. I wish I would have taken a picture of the severe damage done by the water before the severe damage done by the plumber.



If you were laying on the floor of my bathroom, this is what you would now see.

I guess the universe likes to even things out...win a super give-away...have your ceiling fall in on you...the universe is now back in perfect harmony.

Prepare to be Super Jealous

I found Lelan of The Goodness Behind the Gravy from Mique of 30 Days.

Well, lovely Mique had a giveaway of amazing things from Lelan.

Address Labels

Branch Wrap Around Labels

Marquee Monogram

Guess what. I won. Yep. Me. The girl who never wins anything actually won something. Yippee team Ash J!

Sarcasm

It's here...punctuation for your sarcastic comments...the SarcMark.

Click here to download it, it's $1.99. I don't think I like it. I'll stick with having to explain that I was being sarcastic.

Number 2

I told you about my students writing goals here and about how one of my students wanted to "be more awesome" and "find a girlfriend."

What I forgot to mention was that the next day he said, "Hey Miss J. My number 2 is coming along pretty good." Because I was teaching and it was a crazy time, I had no idea what he was talking about and immediately thought he was talking about poop...mostly because he's a sixth grade boy and why else would you say "number 2" if not referring to that "number 2." Because I didn't think he need to tell me about how great his number 2s are, I questioned him a bit more. He said, "Remember yesterday? My number 2...the letter?" Cue light bulbs. Oh. The girlfriend. "That's nice K. but I still don't think it's a great goal for you."

So, being the sarcastic, always-give-you-a-hard-time-but-in-a-loving-way teacher that I am, I ask him about the goal every once in a while by saying something like, "How's your number 2 coming?" And I always do so when he's with girls because it's just too easy. He usually says something like, "Oh, pretty well."

Today was different...today when asked, he said,

"I finished that goal yesterday."

"Someone at this school?"

"No. She's a year older."

"Oh, K. Good luck."

Things That Annoy Me--January 2010

1. Inversion

2. People that constantly update their Facebook status. I don't care that you're eating a sandwich or that you are visiting a friend or that you're standing in line or that you just woke up or that you're going to the bathroom or anything else stupid and superficial. Just stop and think, "If I said this out loud would I sound like a tool?" If the answer is yes, don't say it. Get a blog and write about it instead. Always add pictures.

3. Empire State of Mind by Jay-Z. It's not so much the song as it is the fact that I can guarantee it is on the radio RIGHT NOW. Really. Go check. I'll wait.

4. Students who know from personal experience what it's liked to be bullied but bully others despite that fact.

5. Inside recess days. They are slowly going to kill me.

6. All these "don't tell any men" emails I keep getting on Facebook.

7. Not getting the email and wondering why people are karate chopping bananas and dancing with pickles.

8. Couples who have joint email and Facebook accounts. Maybe I want to tell you about something that happened to me but I don't feel comfortable also telling your husband. Now I guess you'll never know, Mrs. We-Have-A-Joint-Account-Because-We-Love-Each-Other-So-Much.

9. Whoever it is that insists on running up and down the staircase in my complex during all hours of the night. This person must be 500 pounds but very quick. And I think he/she runs up the stairs while wearing roller blades. I hate you, you ridiculously fast and fat roller blade wearing person!

10. People who have blogs but never update. I'm sorry you have kids and that you are a good mom but I need to hear about your adventures...geesh. (pretend that's in sarcastic font...really it's happening.)





...I was right about the song, wasn't I?